Fill a medium saucepan halfway with water and bring to a boil over high heat. Reduce the heat to a simmer and gently lower the eggs into the water with tongs or a slotted spoon. Cover and let simmer for 4–6 minutes, depending on how runny you like your eggs. Remove from the heat and run the eggs under cold water for about 30 seconds.

This is the fun part: take a serrated knife and cut each egg in half. Use a spoon to scoop out the runny insides into a bowl, and smash them into small pieces. Add the butter, season with the salt and pepper, and serve over toast. Some like the toast cut up into pieces and mixed in, but I’m a purist. Eat and moan in agony until the pain stops.